Bad Cop
Multiple metaphors exist to describe a relationship in which one person insinuates while the other intimidates. Although, interestingly enough, Insinuator and Intimidator are not part of this imagery. In addition to cop references, there are also a handful of animal comparisons:
“If Hales was a nice guy, Novick was his enforcer. Standing four feet, nine inches tall, with thick glasses and a voice that pitched steadily higher as he got angry, Novick was a bulldog.”
Bro-Speak
The term “bro-speak” is itself a metaphor for…something. Apparently, a kind of shorthand that is not overly concerned with precision and specifics. But what “bro-speak” really seems to be is just a catch-all phrase for speaking in meaningless metaphor:
“The best metric I can give you is that Uber is killing it in San Francisco and we’re crushing it in New York.”
Allusions and References
In describing one of the initial attempts at creating a self-driving car, allusion and referencing reigns supreme. Sadly for the vehicle itself, the writer alludes to one of nursery rhyme’s least heroic figures while referencing a high-tech cinematic vision of the future in a most negative context:
“…the audience saw an egg-shaped, stark white two-seater vehicle doing laps around a parking lot. It was ugly and small. The front of the vehicle looked like a smiley face, as if Humpty Dumpty had turned into a golf cart. Blade Runner this was not.”
Grey is Almost Never Good
There is a certain vague, inefficient, and mostly meaningless metaphor in the world of legalese that is often used to define those arenas where judicial complaints rarely get reconciled in a way beneficial to the little guy who has gotten screwed. They don’t call these legal badlands by something corrosively obvious. In fact, it is the very lack of malevolence attached that makes them seem actually benign. Which, of course, they aren’t:
“Compliance is one of the most important safeguards a company can have, as it ensures a company acts within the law. But when a company actively seeks out legal `grey areas’ during rapid expansion, compliance, by definition, is not a priority.”
Uber Men
The portrait of Uber as a viable corporate entity presented in this text is, well, less than inspirational. In fact, one may be moved to wonder one of either two things: how Uber still manages to be in existence or, alternatively, why Uber is not the most successful company in the world. Depending upon one’s perspective toward regulatory law, that is:
“Not that HR was a particularly robust department at Uber. Like compliance, it felt like an afterthought.”
