- Colin Singleton
- Colin Singleton is an anagram-loving seventeen-year-old boy who is depressed. Though he was a child-prodigy with an IQ of over 200, he has not yet become a "genius". Colin finds everything interesting, especially things that other people seem to not care much about. Because of this, it is difficult for people to relate to Colin. After only dating Katherines, Colin breaks the streak by dating Lindsey Lee Wells, whom he met on his road trip with Hassan. Throughout the novel Colin feels as though there is a hole in his stomach, and he is looking to fill it. Colin spends his time striving to be unique, but with Lindsey's help, ends up coming to the realization that he is "not-unique in the very best way possible."
- Hassan Harbish
- Hassan Harbish is Colin's lazy, funny, and slightly overweight best, and only, friend. Though he is smart and has been accepted to college, Hassan takes a year off. At first Hassan does not seem to plan furthering his education. He convinces Colin to go on a road trip in order to break out of his depression. Hassan is Muslim and prays regularly, acting with strict religiosity, until he dates Katrina. Hassan is an integral part to Colin's journey of finding his true identity.
- Lindsey Lee Wells
- Lindsey Lee Wells meets Colin and Hassan on their road trip in Gutshot, Tennessee. She is a paramedic-in-training who also gives tours of Gutshot. When Lindsey first appears in the novel, she is dating someone else named Colin, not the protagonist. However, she doesn't feel like she is truly herself until she starts hanging around Colin Singleton. Like Colin, Lindsey seems to be struggling with her identity. Inspired by Colin's ability to always be himself, Lindsey finally becomes herself.
- Hollis Wells
- Lindsey's mother. An extreme workaholic. Very kind to the people who work at her factory.
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