Relationship Between Mother and Daughter
As in much of Amy Tan's work, the main theme is the relationship between mother and daughter, and the relationship between "old" China and the "new" Chinese American cultures that share the home and the family. Amy wanted her mother to make foods that would seem familiar and acceptable to their American guests, whereas her mother wanted to share some of her heritage and culture with them. Amy is also so busy wanting to reject her heritage that she is also in some ways rejecting her mother's way of showing how much she loves her; all of the foods were Amy's favorites, but she is unable to see this because the only thing she can actually see clearly is how embarrassed she is by the traditional Chinese food and the fact that her family does not have very good manners.
Internal Struggles of First Generation Chinese Americans
Amy is a first generation Chinese American, and as can be seen in the story, is struggling with her identity culturally. At home, she enjoys the traditions and foods of her ancestors, but she does not want others to see this side of her and wants to present only her American side to the world. She is not keen to embrace her cultural heritage and history because it is not something that she is familiar with by her own experience. Like many of Tan's stories and novels, "Fish Cheeks" shows the internal struggle going on in young Asian Americans who are pressured to maintain their cultural identity by their families but who identify as Americans and do not feel that the old ways from the old country are relevant to them.
Teen Crushes
A smaller theme in the story is that of teen love; Amy has a crush on Robert, and this becomes the most important thing in her life, despite the fact that years after the dinner that seemed to traumatize her so much at the time, she can barely remember it, and admits that it had no lasting impact on her life.
