April Inventory
A poem about the changing seasons, aging, teaching and what is of value.
Heart's Needles
The poem begins with a dedication to Cynthia, then a quotation of the story 'After the Middle-Irish Romance, The Madness of Suibhne,' in which the character Suibhne refuses to come home, so Loingseachan tells him that many of his family members are dead, including his father, mother, sister, daughter and son. Suibhne response becomes more upset each time he is told of another family member that has died, until eventually he falls out of a tree and Loingseachan puts him in shackles. The title, Heart's Needle comes from the Suibhne's line "And an only daughter is the needle of the heart," in this story.
The first section is written in the voice of someone who has been sent to the cold war and separated from their child, whose mind has been hurt, but who addresses their child, speaking of how they plan to keep the child's mind, described as an untouched snowy land, free from pain.
The second section begins with the speaker telling the child, who is now a toddler, that they have built them a special garden to play in where they will be safe. This section is set during spring. The child seems to destroy the protection of the garden and the speaker says he can do nothing about it. The child plants seeds and the speaker tells the child to look at the flowers when they grow, because they themselves will not be there at that time.
In section three, a scene is described in which a child is swung by the arms over a puddle by their parents, then the parents separate physically from one another and the child. It then mentions the cold war and the soldiers that sat in the trenches, going nowhere. The speaker says it is better for the soldiers to be captured than to move to an area that will be destroyed with no survivors. The speaker describes the end of the war, prisoners coming home and things going back to normal. They say that nobody appears to be happy. The speaker says they yanked the child's hand once and broke their wrist, but that it was during a game. The address the fact they are gone and mention that it could be comforting for the child that some literature could suggest the speaker is their mother.
Section four: The speaker describes telling the child that they must leave and how the child cries. Then a scene is described where the speaker and child pick flowers and appear happy, but the language of winter is still there in the undertones suggesting all is not well. The speaker recalls that their friend's child had a cricket outside their window that died and caused them to cry.
Winter returns in section five. The child is three and becoming unfamiliar to the speaker. The child doesn't remember the speaker not being there or the time before that. The child is also unswayed by the winter and its storms, which the speaker describes in detail.
In section six, it is Easter. The child has an egg and the speaker and child shout to hear their echoes. The speaker remembers that the child was born here on the bank.
The speaker describes the nature and tells the child that they remember this place and mention their memories there together. The speaker says the child still lives nearby (assuming they are speaking to the child as an adult).
Men come and cut down parts of the trees and birds die. The child catches a bird in a net. The child gets ill and cannot breathe properly. The speaker thinks about death and the choice to die, then reveals they have another wife and child.
In section seven, the child plays on the swings and the speaker thinks about how the child always comes back to them. It is the summer time.
Section eight: The child refuses to eat their food and is punished. They go to see the rabbits and look at the stars. The speaker describes eating in local restaurants and eating packed lunches. The speaker goes to a jail and learns to cook to feed the child better food. They conclude that the child must come there less frequently. At Halloween, the child visits for a week and dresses up. They go trick-or-treating. When the child de-masks themselves, the neighbors don't recognize them. The child leaves.
Section 9: It's winter. The speaker doesn't know how the child is. They haven't seen the child in three months. The speaker describes the child's toys and speaks of their step-sister. She then describes disturbing, scientific endeavors. The speaker says the child is only a mile away, yet they haven't seen them in three months.
Section 10: The change of the seasons is described and the speaker reveals the child is their daughter.
A Locked House
The speaker describes seeing their house from afar when arriving home and worrying that i could catch fire or be broken into. They always find it safely locked. They joked about what they had to fear and mention that there neighbors are safe. The speaker and their partner discuss how if things rot or burn, they are stronger together and know what really matters. The speaker speaks of friends whose love didn't last and says they warned each other. At the end of the poem, the house is locked and empty. The speaker's partner left. It was a surprise to everyone. The speaker visits sometimes. The crimes were caused by themselves, the speaker concludes.
