Although it is literally incidental, this diary still has the feel of a crafted novel. Perhaps this can be seen as proof that Nin actually considered her life a work of art. Her deep emotions are powerful and meaningful, and because she writes so candidly in her diary, the reader is allowed a chance to speculate about her character alongside her. Perhaps they might even psychologize her as an author, because after all, Nin makes it very clear that she feels there are aspects of her mind that merit medical attention.
Right off the bat, an astute reader must see three interconnected facts. First, Nin's diary is simply full to the brim with her sexual appetite which takes her from affair to affair in a long chain of sexually heated encounters. Then, there is her decision to get therapy which has the unintended effect of changing her attitude toward romance. Thirdly, there is her relationship to incest. Although she never accuses her father of abuse, she does publish famous books about incest, and then she finally sees her father again, they have sex over and over again.
Nin reports feeling an infinite anger against her father, but she refuses to admit that it is related to his predatory sexuality or his willingness to have sex with her. She accepts his advances, and she reports feeling that by allowing him to have her, the anger is vented somehow. She admits that the encounters are arousing and cathartic. Perhaps one way of untangling these complicated psychological intimacies is to say that she resents her father for flirting with her, because he communicates to her that he would be sexually interested in her. This would be subtle enough to drive any young daughter into a long, challenging life. It would certainly explain Nin's own behavior which is admittedly masculine, she says—masculine like her father's example, because both are philanderers in their private life.
