Summary
This untitled poem appears in the first section of the collection, entitled "the hurting." The first line of the poem reads "you tell me to quiet down cause." The person who told the speaker to quiet down did so because the speaker's opinions apparently lessened her beauty. But the speaker states that she was not created with a fire-like energy in her body just to be dampened and put out. She was not created with a lightness on her tongue so that she could be easy to swallow. This speaker was made heavy in a material and unforgettable way ("half blade and half silk"). She is not easy to mentally categorize, and does not intend to dumb herself down for the sake of others.
Analysis
In the poem "you tell me to quiet down..." the speaker responds to a demand for silence. The general assumption is that the speaker's opinions make her less beautiful and that silence makes her more valuable. This was communicated to her by an unspecified "you" who stands for anyone in the speaker's life who encouraged her to be quiet and shrink herself down. "you tell me to quiet down..." communicates a feminist sentiment by challenging the belief that the most important qualities for a woman are to be physically attractive and demure.
This free verse poem is composed of one stanza that uses vivid imagery to assert the speaker's existence. For example, the speaker states that she was "not made with a fire in [her] belly / so [she] could be put out." The image of fire in one's belly describes an intense passion for life, and the speaker does not want her passion to be dampened. To be "put out" means to be disappointed, but alongside the fire metaphor it evokes the way the speaker feels extinguished on an existential level when she cannot fully express herself. The line "but i was not made with a fire in my belly" is among the longest in the poem, and it contrasts with the much shorter "so i could be put out." This contrast shows how quickly the speaker's passion can be dampened, but this poem is testimony that the speaker is done allowing others to put out her fire.
Using the anaphora "i was not made," the speaker continues to take a stand against the demand for her silence. The line "i was not made with a lightness on my tongue" is the longest in the poem, which shows that the speaker's lightness comes directly from her ability to express herself. As an image, the word "lightness" works in multiple dimensions in terms of weight and light, but ultimately it refers to the speaker's emotional ease. Her lightness is not meant to be "easy to swallow," meaning that her energy is not available for others to consume. This description of physical and energetic consumption occurs throughout the collection. For example, in "the first boy that kissed me," the speaker evokes the way males treat females as a form of "feasting." Here, the speaker refuses to allow others to "[feast]" on or to "[swallow]" her.
The speaker asserts herself in a concrete and material way. Despite the lightness on her tongue, the speaker states that she "was made heavy." This shows the complexity of the speaker's self; she does not care if she contradicts herself. She describes herself as "half blade and half silk," an image that evokes both beauty and danger. This is very similar to the way that surrealist André Breton described Frida Kahlo's paintings as a ribbon wrapped around a bomb. Despite not communicating any specific details about her life and experiences, the speaker claims that she is "difficult to forget and not easy / for the mind to follow." The line break in these last lines shows that the speaker is done trying to make herself palatable and easy to understand, or easy in any way at all. She does not care to be mentally categorized. Overall, this poem is the speaker's celebration of her self-expression and a refusal to submit to the demand for silence.
