Summary
As Malone takes his leave from Violet, noting with satisfaction that she will make a good wife for his son, he runs into Tanner and Ramsden. Tanner, unsurprisingly, greets the billionaire with sarcasm, asking if he plans to buy the Alhambra. He replies that he’s actually in town to do business with a certain Mr. Mendoza. The focus then shifts to Octavius and Ann. Ann flirts with Octavius, who then confesses his love for her. Ann replies that she cannot return the sentiment, since her mother wants her to marry Tanner. Octavius is shocked and angry that his friend has apparently been after the woman he loves, but Ann urges him not to blame Tanner, saying that her mother and late father are the ones behind this plan, and that Tanner is as bewildered as Octavius. Octavius tries to dissuade her from following her parents’ alleged wishes, telling her that it would be immoral to marry a man she does not love, but Ann dismisses this reasoning with affectionate pity.
Ann reflects that Octavius will always love her, and Octavius dramatically agrees with a speech about how Ann’s white hair will, even in his old age, cause him to tremble with adoration. She continues to react in the same way she generally reacts to Octavius—by affectionately but condescendingly acknowledging his love, and making sure to indicate that it is returned only to the extent that she won’t have to marry him or act on her feelings in any way. In this instance, she tells him that his poetic speech moves her and makes her feel that they have “immortal souls.” This confession, ironically, makes it easier for Ann to reject Octavius's affection, since she frames her own feelings in such an abstract and vague way. Ann then comforts Octavius by explaining that he’ll enjoy living with a broken heart. She tells him that he will enjoy being a brokenhearted London bachelor, since solitary self-pity is in fact enjoyable, provided one has money. Octavius bitterly replies that she will not have to disillusion Tanner in the same way, and Ann agrees, explaining almost rapturously that it will be easier for her to overturn Tanner’s negative opinion of her than it will for her to live up to Octavius’s crushing expectations. Octavius offers, ruefully, to tell Tanner that Ann loves him.
In response, Ann tells him that this won’t be necessary and might even scare Tanner off, but she also takes it as proof that Octavius is in fact enjoying his newly permanent bachelorhood, and is even relieved to be done with the suspense of unrequited love. After all, she says, his offer to facilitate Ann and Tanner’s love cannot be entirely self-sacrificing, and must stem in part from a certain enjoyment of his situation. With her usual mixture of cruelty, sweetness, and razor-sharp observation, Ann tells Octavius that he is in fact acting like a poet, causing himself pain in order to induce artistic anguish.
When Octavius emphasizes his heartbreak to Ann, she tells him that he’s nothing like his sister, Violet, who is much tougher. In fact, Ann seems to feel some envy towards Violet, explaining that Violet is able to get what she wants from others without manipulation. Octavius comforts Ann by telling her that she, too, is generally able to get more or less whatever she wants from people, but Ann insists that it isn’t the same—she has to take advantage of others’ “sentimentality” in order to do so. The two finally part, loosely agreeing to forgive one another in spite of the sadness each has caused the other. After Ann runs off, choosing not to kiss Octavius goodbye, Octavius sobs quietly.
While he’s crying, Octavius is discovered by Ann’s mother, Mrs. Whitefield. She asks him whether he’s crying because of his sister’s marriage to Hector Malone, and he says that he is not. In fact, he says, he’s crying about Ann, though he doesn’t blame Mrs. Whitefield. Mrs. Whitefield is bewildered by his reassurance, asking what he would possibly blame her for. He explains that Ann is planning to marry Tanner at her parents’ urging. Mrs. Whitefield sets him straight, telling him what the audience has likely suspected for awhile—Ann is simply using her parents’ as an excuse to marry Jack, which has been her preference all along.
At this climactic moment, Jack Tanner returns, chatting obliviously about Mendoza and Mr. Malone, who have now been introduced. Octavius, rather than confront his friend, leaves with a few cryptic words. Tanner and Mrs. Whitefield sit down together. Mrs. Whitefield tells Tanner that she feels more affection for him, Octavius, and Violet than for her own two children. She attributes this upside-down quality of modern life to a speech by a certain “Tyndall,” referencing an 1874 speech by John Tyndall about the material nature of the world. Tanner agrees that the world seems more confusing than ever. Mrs. Whitefield then warns Tanner not to spread rumors about her and asks him not to blame her for his upcoming marriage to Ann, since it is causing Octavius to turn against her. Tanner is startled, insisting that he does not in fact plan on marrying Ann at all. Though Mrs. Whitefield has been unenthusiastic about the idea of Ann and Tanner marrying, she’s now confused, and tells Tanner that he is the only person who can match Ann. Tanner disagrees, repeating his viewpoint that Ann, like other women, would essentially enslave him to her. Ann in particular, he says, is a bully and a coquette, repeatedly raising Octavius’s hopes only to crush them later. Ann’s mother actually agrees with this characterization of her daughter, but wants Tanner to wed her for these precise reasons— essentially, tough as he is, he’ll be able to withstand her cruelty better than Octavius could.
Ann and Violet then emerge from the house. Ann slyly hints that she has heard every word of Tanner and Mrs. Whitefield’s conversation, but Tanner calls her out, sure that she is lying in order to gain the upper hand. Mrs. Whitefield, meanwhile, insists that she doesn’t care whether or not her daughter has heard their gossip. Violet announces that she’s leaving for her honeymoon, and Mrs. Whitefield begins to cry, telling Violet that she wishes Violet were her daughter. She stops only when Ann intervenes, noting that the crying might distress Violet. Violet invites Mrs. Whitefield to see her off, leaving Ann and Tanner. Ann tells Tanner that he should get married as soon as possible. Tanner responds angrily that he doesn’t want to get married, and yet everyone, from Octavius to Mrs. Whitefield, seems to believe the matter settled. He’s afraid, he confesses, that he will marry Ann not out of his own free will but because of the pressure placed on him from outside.
Ann acts deeply unconcerned the entire time, telling Tanner that she will make herself ugly if they marry so as not to distract Tanner. He is not pleased by this, since he believes that, if this happened, he would be trapped without even the reward of his wife’s beauty. Ann tries a different tack, saying that she is probably not attractive to Tanner anyway, given how long they have known one another, but Tanner disagrees. Tanner begs Ann to marry Octavius, but she tells him, serenely, that Octavius will be a lifelong bachelor, in spite of—or because of—his romantic personality. While the two argue over who would make a better match for whom, Ann confesses that she asked for Tanner to serve as her guardian, planning from the beginning to marry him. He insists that he will not marry her, and she announces sadly that he does not love her.
It is this announcement that causes him to change his mind: he seizes her and insists that he does indeed love her, but will not sacrifice his freedom. Once that admission has been made, Tanner is literally unable to disentangle himself from Ann. In fact, he holds her so tight that she begins to feel faint. At this point, nearly every character arrives at once: Violet, Octavius, Mrs. Whitefield, Malone, Ramsden, Mendoza, and Straker. Swooning, Ann explains that Tanner has decided to marry her. Mild chaos ensues: every character crowds around Ann, though Straker urges them to give her space. Octavius gives Tanner his blessing to marry Ann, though Tanner continues to declare that he has been trapped and has no desire to marry. Ann revives; Tanner gives a lively speech in which he warns that his marriage to Ann will be a casual, unromantic legal affair, which Ann seems to find adorable. The play ends with the laughter of all onstage.
Analysis
In these final scenes, the romantic tensions that have driven so much of this play’s plot are allowed to take center stage (so to speak), occupying the thematic core of the story. The driving issue here, which seems to animate every character in distinct ways, is the unpredictable nature of love. Every character finds himself or herself unable to love the person they would prefer to, or the person they feel they are “supposed” to love. In order to explore the topic deeply, we can examine each individuals’ feelings of love and the ensuing distress he or she experiences.
Ann, for her part, seems exquisitely controlled: she loves Tanner and is able to convince him that he loves her back. However, if we look closely, it doesn’t so much seem that she’s been able to choose whom to love. Rather, she’s simply very self-aware and almost viciously pragmatic. She knows, for instance, that Octavius cannot marry her or anyone else, and that the very intensity of his romantic, poetic personality will cause him to be happy only in eternal bachelorhood. Ann doesn’t seem to mind breaking a few hearts, but she also isn’t quite the bully that Tanner accuses her of being. Instead, she’s a clear-eyed, if somewhat unempathetic, person, who sees it as her responsibility to adapt to and even speed up the inevitable order of events even if it causes temporary conflict.
Octavius, meanwhile, insists that Ann is wrong, and that he takes no satisfaction in his brokenhearted state. His actions, however, contradict his words. Bernard Shaw’s ever-detailed stage directions tell us that Octavius has begun to enjoy his rejected status without knowing it. Bernard Shaw is fascinated here by the way that happiness often comes, not from getting what we want, but from fitting into a prescribed, well-defined role. In this case, Octavius derives satisfaction from his role as an eternally morose bachelor. For Octavius, love is mostly a source of happiness if it is not returned, and if it is mixed with deep sadness. Ann is the only person to pick up on this oxymoronic truth, and so, in a sense, her rejection of Octavius makes her the perfect match for him.
Tanner, meanwhile, is forced to admit that he loves Ann in spite of the fact that he doesn’t want to love her, or any woman, at all. While Octavius’s love earns its potency from accompanying sadness, the rebellious Tanner’s love instead earns its intensity from the very fact of its unwelcomeness. Tanner’s principles and politics should allow him to keep romance at bay, since he thinks it’s a distraction from socialism and art, but a combination of physical attraction and social pressure make him unable to resist Ann. In fact, his professed dislike for Ann makes his feelings even more intense, as if the conflict is actually between what he wants to want and what he truly desires. Therefore his love, like Octavius’s, is loaded with irony: it only matters insofar as he wants it not to.
Finally, Mrs. Whitefield herself experiences the unpredictable behavior of love when she confesses that she loves Octavius, Violet, and Tanner perhaps more than she loves her own children. This confession, among other things, emphasizes the strong feelings that Ann evokes in almost everyone, including her own mother. Ann is one of the more forceful characters in this play, but she also works as a kind of mirror, showing more about other characters than she does about herself. Therefore she teases out some of the stranger romantic preferences in each male protagonist, and, at the same time, reveals her own mother’s more maternal side—but only because Mrs. Whitefield’s distaste for her own child brings out her affection for other peoples’.
