Cheever's marriage was damaged by his unfaithfulness.[21][22] His sexuality has been described as gay, homosexual, or bisexual. Cheever had relationships with both men and women, including a short relationship with composer Ned Rorem and an affair with actress Hope Lange.[23][24][25][26][27][28] Cheever's longest affair was with a student of his, Max Zimmer,[21] who lived in the Cheever family home. Cheever's daughter, Susan, described her parents' marriage as "European", saying: "they were people who felt their feelings weren't necessarily a reason to shatter a family. They certainly hurt each other plenty but they didn't necessarily see that as a reason for divorce."[29][30]
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