Cockroach Irony

Cockroach Irony

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The protagonist ran downstairs where he was met by “two Jehovah’s Witness ladies” who “flashed their Caribbean smiles” and “obstructed” his flight with “towering feathery straw hats.” “Are you aware of the hole in the ozone above us?” they asked. According to the ladies, Apocalypse was coming, so “soon” everyone would “fry.” Only “the cockroaches” would be able to “survive to rule the earth.” But there was a chance “to redeem yourself today.”” If you buy “this magazine” and attend “Bible gatherings”, you will live. The irony is that you can’t buy redemption - not to mention that they used Apocalypse as a marketing tactic.

A philosopher

The protagonist spotted Professor Youssef “sitting alone at his usual table.” That “lazy, pretentious, Algerian pseudo-French intellectual” always dressed up in “gabardine suits with the same thin tie” that “had its glory in the seventies.” He hid “behind his sixties-era eyeglasses” and emulated “French thinkers” by “smoking his pipe in dimly lit spots.” He spent “all day in that café” and talked about literature. The irony was that the great French philosophers didn’t spend their time smoking pipes all day long, Professor Youssef had almost nothing in common with them.

Good for health

A joint will warm my bones,” thought the protagonist, “or at least numb my brains.” He “slipped inside” his closet and reached “for the secret hole beside the top shelf.” The man “pulled out a plastic film canister” and “the thin white papers that went with it.” Only “a small amount of hash was left.” He cut and “tried to roll it”, but his fingers were cold and shaky. Besides, he “had no tobacco to mix with the stuff.” “Cigarettes are bad for one’s health,” he consoled himself. The irony was that the protagonist had never really cared about his health even a bit; he even had tried to commit suicide.

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