At the end of chapter nineteen, Saul remembers his past. What are the theories he has of his family and what does he use to cope with the loss of them?

Saul reflects on his parents and wonders if they are alive or not. He wonders if drink (alcohol) had taken them as hockey has taken him. He feels lonely and yearns for them but he also knows this ache will be dispelled with the, "sheen of the rink in the sunlight."