I Hate Hamlet Summary

I Hate Hamlet Summary

ACT ONE

Andrew Rally moves into his new brownstone apartment in NYC shortly after the TV program which made him famous is canceled. The brownstone holds a kind of totemic lure over Andrew after learning that John Barrymore once lived in the building from his real estate agent, Felicia. His agent Lillian Troy claims to have once had an affair with Barrymore and confirms the legend’s connection to the brownstone. Offhandedly, Lillian inquires whether Andrew has located her hairpins.

Embarrassed by the fact that he rose to fame in a bad TV show, Andrew excitedly announces being offered a chance to play one of Barrymore’s greatest roles: Hamlet. His girlfriend Dierdre, impressed by the gothic atmosphere of the apartment, suggests the idea of trying to make contact with the spirt of the long since dead Barrymore. Felicia admits to possessing psychic powers which she has successfully used to contact her dead mother, but Andrew is hesitant because—he is finally forced to admit—he has actually always hated Hamlet. At the moment he voices this confession, thunder is accompanied by the silhouetted profile of man cast in shadow on the wall: Barrymore’s famous nickname was The Great Profile.

Unfortunately, for Andrew, he alone sees this specter.

Because of this, the attempt to contact the spirit of Barrymore is deemed pointless by Felicia since there is nothing in the home which might be useful in luring the actor back to the world of the living. Before leaving, Lillian finds one of the enigmatic hairpins mentioned earlier. Alone with Deirdre, Andrew’s excitement is actually revealed to be anxiety. He expresses deep concern about being able to carry off really serious acting which is so far removed from what has been demanded of him so far. Dierdre further intensifies his anxieties by rebuffing both his sexual overtures and proposal. Finally, he calls his agent and leaves a message asking that she turn down the opportunity to play Hamlet. Popping the cork off a bottle champagne to celebrate moving into his new home brings an unexpected visitor: the ghost of John Barrymore.

Barrymore informs the young actor that he is appearing to him in order to help him play the part of the Melancholy Dane. Turns out that this is one of those word theater traditions that make actors so superstitious. Barrymore gives Andrew some unique guidance into the secret of playing the most famous role in the history of drama: Hamlet is just a frat boy at the peak of his sexual dynamism. Andrew responds by telling Barrymore all about his relationship issues with Dierdre who appears in nightgown. To Dierdre who cannot see the ghost of Barrymore, however, Andrew appears to be talking to himself and she assumes that he trying to work his way into the more mentally unbalanced aspect of Hamlet’s complicated personality. Thanks to some relationship coaching from Barrymore along with acting lessons, things take an unforeseen turn as Rally has suddenly almost succeeded in seducing Deirdre into bed when suddenly they are interrupted by the doorbell.

The visitor is Gary Lefkowitz who wants to seduce Rally into taking part in an upcoming TV show. His view of stage acting is in direct conflict with Dierdre. She is excited about Rally becoming a Shakespearean actor while Gary dismisses stage plays pretentious claptrap. Barrymore weighs in once Gary leaves by gently reminding Rally that money and fame are not worth the sacrifice that comes with giving up the stage. Rally’s own anxieties about his talent make him resistant to Barrymore’s advice and eventually this situation erupts in a fencing duel in which suffering physical injury at the hands of Barrymore results in a sudden mental and emotional strength.

ACT TWO, Scene One

Six weeks later and Andrew is preparing for opening night as Hamlet for a performance in Central Park. Felicia and Deirdre discuss the striking changes that have taken place in Andrew since the night he moved into the brownstone. Rehearsals seem to have served the process of making him a truly serious actor in every meaning of the word. They also discuss the apparent influence of Barrymore on him while oblivious to the fact that the ghost of the Great Profile is making a running sarcastic commentary on their observations. Gary also shows up just before Andrew enters the scene dressed as Hamlet and behaving like John Barrymore. When all three have finally left, Andrew can finally talk to Barrymore

The topic of discussion is acting in general and Barrymore draws on the advice the player gives to Hamlet in Act Three. Andrew’s outward appearance is remarkably more confident, but privately he is still wracked by doubt and anxiety over his talent. Barrymore responds by telling him that all actors fear playing the most famous role in the English language. His anxieties rising to the surface, Andrew’s response is biting, reminding Barrymore than after his celebrated performance in the role, he moved to Hollywood and became a drunken parody of himself. Barrymore’s defense is equally sharp: before that terrible second act of his own life, at least he could say he curtain closed on a first act that saw him facing the dragon. Then the zinger: “I played Hamlet. Have you?”

Lillian arrives and attempts to soothe Andrew’s opening night jitters. When he leaves, Lillian turns to Barrymore and confesses that she, too, can see him. They reminisce about their love affair and it is revealed that this became part of a lawsuit which led her to divorcing her husband. She asks questions about what goes on in the afterlife and just before the scene ends, the lights begin to dim and they begin to dance.

ACT TWO, Scene Two

Barrymore is sleeping in the brownstone as the television airs a commercial starring Andrew. Andrew arrives and gives Barrymore the bad news: he was a total failure in the role. Gary follows carrying the reviews that confirm this to be a universal view. Having earlier asserted that his performance as Hamlet could offer no insight into whether he would succeed in his TV project, he proceeds to extend an offer of three million dollars to Andrew to take the part. Andrew turns him down.

Felicia enters with news that she is going out to Hollywood with Lefkowitz and has come to say goodbye. Deirdre has woken up and enters from the bedroom with an enthralling tale about what happened overnight: suicidal, she made her way to the roof of the brownstone where the strangest sensation occurred. Although it could only have been the breeze, it felt exactly like a hand had gently caressed her neck. The next thing she can remember is waking up in the morning with a rose place on a pillow and her copy of Romeo and Juliet lying beside her, opened. As if still in the throes of seduction, she tempts Andrew to join her back in the bed. But Andrew is feeling far from amorous.

He realizes that not only has the ghost of Barrymore successfully seduced his girlfriend, but in doing so he even took her virginity. This realization nearly drives him to a rage, but after finally being calmed down, he talks with Barrymore instead about his performance, and focusing on the few individual moments he thinks he nailed the part. Barrymore responds that nobody should ever ask for more than from playing Hamlet.

It is now time for Barrymore to head back to the afterlife, but before he goes, he makes one final request of Andrew: to demonstrate his method of bowing to the audience. As he is about to show him, Andrew looks toward the audience and suddenly he actually sees an audience. An audience that clapping for him. Barrymore makes his was to center stage and proceeds to demonstrate his own melodramatic and highly theatric manner of bowing to an appreciate audience. Then he calls for Andrew to join him and as the curtain closes, Andrew also performs his bow with a grand, Barrymore-esque flourish.

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