From Crime and Punishment part 2 chapters 1-4
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This is his reaction to the bloody clothing and evidence, as he moves through the room attempting to gather everything together that might link him to the crime. In context, he felt as if he were going crazy. His memory and reflection were dulled, and that was what he believed to be his punishment....... the sense that he couldn't think straight and was losing his mind.
‘Pieces of torn linen couldn’t rouse suspicion, whatever happened; I think not, I think not, any way!’ he repeated, standing in the middle of the room, and with painful concentration he fell to gazing about him again, at the floor and everywhere, trying to make sure he had not forgotten anything. The conviction that all his faculties, even memory, and the simplest power of reflection were failing him, began to be an insufferable torture.
‘Surely it isn’t beginning already! Surely it isn’t my punishment coming upon me? It is!’
Crime and Punishment