A Separate Peace

WHy does gene feel his purpose mush have been to "become a part of Phineas"?

chapter 6

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Gene wants to be assimilated into his friend Phineas. Part of this is guilt over the accident and part of this has to do with some underlying homo-erotic feelings that remain unfulfilled or not quite understood. Really Gene can't accomplish this, it's impossible to inhabit someone else, the best he can hope for is a "separate peace."