is it the right thing for nora to leave her husband and kids?
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For Nora, her action was the right thing. She felt trapped; she felt like a play thing taken down from the shelf when her husband deemed her worth paying attention to; she had no fulfillment, no individuality. Torvald not only doesn't treat her as a wife, he can't even comprehend what she did for him...... he leaves her hanging, no support, no interference. This realization that there isn't and has never been any love between them seals her decision to leave.
"Our home has been nothing but a playroom. I have been your doll-wife, just as at home I was papa's doll-child"
Her exit is a new start.......... and the chance to grow up and be a woman.
A Doll's House
At the end of A Doll’s House, Nora chooses to leave her husband because she believed she was married to a stranger. This brings up the debate whether or not a women, like Nora, is ever justified to walk away from a marriage. Personally I believe it was never okay for her to just walk away from Helmer, her husband, and here is why.
Many things must be taken into account when dealing with this issue. One of the reasons I believe that it was not okay for her to walk away from her marriage was because Nora had already bore 3 kids. “In that moment I realized that for 8 years I had been living here with a complete stranger, and had born him 3 children.” (Ibsen 1122). In my opinion, you should never, ever just walk out on your children. She had no intention of even taking them or seeing them! She says, “I don’t want to see the children. I know they are in better hands than mine.” (1124). The bible says, “But if anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for members of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.” (2 Tim 5:8). The bible clearly states that you should provide for you family. How can she do that if she is gone?
Nora never gave Torvald a chance to prove himself as a husband after she decided things were not working out. To me, that shows complete immaturity. Helmer said, “I have the strength to change.” Nora replies, “Perhaps - if your doll (Nora) is taken from you” (1124). Helmer in desperation begs her, “No, no Nora. I cant conceive of it happening!” (1124). As you can see, Nora decided that leaving Helmer was the best decision without giving him a chance to prove himself. This was the first and only time throughout the play that she confronts him on a problem and once she does, she leaves.
Although Nora is not justified to leave Helmer and the children, one can also understand why she would. Nora says, “You thought it would be fun to be in love with me.” (1120). Nora said this because Helmer wasn’t really in love with her. She was referred to as a doll as you can see above. He was merely going with the flow and seemingly was playing with her whenever he wanted. Dealing with a man that only loves you only sometimes can lead any women insane.
At the end of the story, I believe Nora wasn’t justified to leave the way she did. She left no room for the marriage to find its cure. Even worse, she left her kids to the man that she called a stranger. Although I can feel Nora’s pain because she spent part of her life with a man that didn’t truly love her, I still think her leaving was premature.
Timothy. Http://www.openbible.info. Crossway Bibles, n.d. Web. 29 Aug. 2013.
Nora’s perplexity, which gives the reader impression, that “there are two kinds of moral laws, two kinds of conscience, one for men and one, quite different, for women” is not tenable. Because it is proven that when Krogstad was accused for forgery he was not spared merely on the basis that he is a man and so deserves the right to be free, and on the other hand Nora is considered culprit being a woman. But, the forgery done either by men (like Krogstad) or women (like Nora) requires same treatment and punishment accordingly. But if Nora still fails to understand the law of the land and if she still thinks that the law is prejudiced on her part (or women’s), she should go and try to change the law, but for that tasks one needs to have clear vision and moral standing which Nora seems naïve at.
Does woman has the right to leave her husband and HER children merely on the basis of her expectations on certain much needed issues and in order to have first-hand experience, instead of resolving the same? If the answer of this question is in affirmation then how come husband is denied such right. And if wife and husband start exercising these rights, with such liberation, how come the bond of family system can be protected and maintained and what would be the end results of such immature decision on part of their children?
I personally believe that Nora had no right to leave her husband and kids. Here is why. First and foremost, she is a wife and a mother. Not under any circumstance should a mother leave her children. When you have kids, you first thought should always rest upon the utmost safety and condition of your children. Nora claimed that Torvald was a stranger, therefore, why is she leaving her kids with him? I think that Nora is unaware of the care Torvald has towards her. He may seem very egotistical and self-centered, which in a way is true, but he does show his care for her numerous times throughout the play. He gives her loving nicknames, and showers her with compliments. He puts up with Nora's disobedience and always ends up forgiving her for whatever it is she does wrong. Nora has no right to leave him. When Torvald found out about the letter, he called Nora a hypocrite and a liar. This is probably due to the shock of finding out that Nora had commited a crime and hadn't told him about it. I'm positive many people would feel as Torvald did if they found out that one of their loved ones had commited a serious crime. It's human nature to react like this sometimes. But just because he got mad for a certain amount of time doesn't make him misogyistic. It is evident that he has actual feeling for Nora when he says he forgives her. I just found it careless that Nora didn't even think of at least talking out the situation rather than just leaving. At the end of the day, a husband needs his wife, and children need their mother.