- Dora Chance – 75 years of age, minor theatre and film star, illegitimate daughter of Melchior Hazard and "Pretty Kitty". Believed by outsiders to be the daughter of Peregrine Hazard.
- Nora Chance – Twin sister and best friend of Dora.
- Melchior Hazard – High-profile theatre and film star, known for putting career before his family. Biological Father of Nora and Dora.
- Peregrine Hazard – Twin brother of Melchior, who raises Nora and Dora. Adventurer, explorer, actor. Embodies magic realism and the carnivalesque.
- Lady Atalanta Hazard (Wheelchair) – First wife of Melchior Hazard, mother of Saskia and Imogen. In her later life, she is cared for by Nora and Dora after her daughters push her down a staircase and take all her money
- Delia Delaney (Daisy Duck) – Actress, second wife of Genghis Khan, former lover of Peregrine Hazard, second wife, briefly, of Melchior Hazard. Later marries Puck from the production of 'Midsummer Night's Dream.'
- My Lady Margarine – Third wife of Melchior Hazard. Mother to Gareth and Tristram. Known as "Lady Margarine" because she stars in a margarine advert on TV.
- Grandma Chance – Guardian of Dora and Nora Chance. Peregrine suggests that Grandma Chance may have been Dora and Nora's mother, but Dora considers this unlikely. Nudist and vegetarian. She is also against picking flowers, believing it to be cruel.black
- Saskia Hazard – Legal daughter of Melchior Hazard. TV chef. Cunning and ambitious. Has an ongoing relationship with Tristram, her half brother. Nemesis of Dora Chance. Assumed by Nora and Dora to be the biological daughter of Peregrine Hazard.
- Imogen Hazard – Legal daughter of Melchior Hazard, twin sister of Saskia Hazard. Plays a fish on a children's TV program.
- Tristram Hazard – Son of Melchior Hazard's third marriage. Presenter of "Lashings of Lolly." Twin brother of Gareth.
- Tiffany – Goddaughter of Dora and Nora Chance. Girlfriend of Tristram Hazard, with whom she hosts "Lashings of Lolly", a TV gameshow. Also pregnant with Tristram's baby.
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