Brigham Young University

Can you tell me if this is a good 200 word essay for my application?

At a young age I discovered I had a knack for running. In Cross Country I took 2nd in the state and was in the top 100 in the Nation at the Junior Olympics. In track I broke 2 records at a middle school meet, one for the mile with a time of 5:36 and the ½ mile in a time of 2:36. I had committed my life to running and loved the sport. But 4 years after I started I got seriously injured; I had intense heel pain that prevented me from running. It prevented me from running for 2 years and even after I healed I couldn’t run as well as I had, the pain never went away. No matter how hard I trained I wasn’t getting faster and it was devastating. I was taking second to those who were once so easy to beat. It was heartbreaking. But I knew I couldn’t give up and this experience has taught me that I need to work for the things I want. It's been one of my hardest struggles in life, but it's helped me learn about hard work and dedication. And that is well worth the pain.

Asked by
Last updated by judy t #197809
Answers 1
Add Yours

Whether or not this is a good essay is partly dependent on the question that was asked. You might want to use the essay services of Gradesaver to get some strong input about how this can be "beefed up." The essay does make a point and it certainly shows that through this experience you have gained something. If that is what you were striving for, then it worked.