how do the people back home feel about the war

This depends on where in the novel you are referring to. When Paul visits hime on leave he finds himself disconnected. People have really no clue what the war is like or what is actually happening. Kantorek, Paul's old teacher, is still spouting the same nonsense about "Iron Youth" and patriotism he always had. Paul's friends aren't all dead until the very end of the book.